Dark Skies Ahead

I have very mixed feelings on this bailout thing. While I absolutely don't want a "deep recession", I don't think that this huge bill is necessarily the answer either. What scares me most is how secretive and rushed the whole thing is. There are very few details to the general public (except the price tag) and a huge push to get it done right away. Every time I turn on the news there is another expert telling me why we need this done and why it needs to be done now but no one seems to really explain how it's going to work. I've been reading about the bill and feel like it has good intentions but I don't like that it seems to be a knee-jerk reaction. I did learn that the bill allows for only $250 billion to be paid at first, then the President can wait to see if more money is needed.

There has been a lot of talk about how Wall Street has screwed the folks on Main Street but I think we're missing part of the story. I think blaming the whole kit and caboodle on the financial institutions is like blaming McDonald's for being fat. The general public has to take some responsibility for our own financial mistakes. We borrow way too much! We don't save enough and we leverage things like there will never be a rainy day. Well, I hate to point out the fact that it's raining and now we want the government to provide the umbrella

What a Trip!

Here are some of the New York/DC pics. We had a great time!

It Was an Honor

I had the great opportunity to visit the Vietnam Memorial today. I've seen it once before but today we found someone had left six or seven different "histories" next to certain individual's names. Below each corresponding panel there was a plastic covered "memorial" detailing how that person had served and died during that war. I read the first about a Sergent who was wounded and presumed dead, when his men returned to recover his body, he was gone. It was later learned he died from shrapnel wounds and a leg amputation performed in an enemy field hospital five days after the attack. Another was First Lt. Lane, a female nurse who was the only female in the Vietnam war to die as a direct result of enemy fire. (The hospital she was assigned to was bombed. She died from shrapnel wounds) I was grateful to whomever placed these histories there, it gave me a chance to know more about some of the people who's names are on the wall. Along with their stories was the location of their name on the memorial. I found myself searching to see the actual name on the shiny black marble feeling that it was my duty to honor them by seeing for myself. The wall is a memorial of a time before my time and I know no other way to honor those who are memorialized than to acknowledge them, to see their name and know that they lived, fought and died for their county. It fills me with purpose to believe that because I now know, in a small way their legacy continues. I guess that is the point of memorializing our dead that neither they nor their sacrifice ever be forgotten.

Musical Monday-The Big Apple!

We're off to see New York City this week as well as Washington D.C.. We've got lots planned and we're calling it our "National Treasure Tour". We're taking the two older boys and planning a great time. I'll post pics when we get back! Here's a little Big Apple sound to listen to.

Cringe Worthy Moments

Do you ever find yourself having a flashback of some stupid moment from your past? I think I have had more of these in the last few months than ever before. I've been thinking about the time I fell down at a track meet in elementary school and did the whole damsel in distress bit because I was losing the race. The time in the third grade that I farted in front of Shane, the cute boy, and totally got laughed at. The time a date asked me if I liked Billie Holiday and I said, "Yeah, I love HIM." (Even though I really did know Billie Holiday was a woman, I have to say that to validate myself because I still cringe when I think about the look on his face.) The list goes on and on! I am really quite sure that everyone else has these moments and I thought the best therapy for ridding myself of the "cringe" was to just share my shame with the world.

Now that I've exposed my stupidity, I'm hoping you'll do the same. Go on, tell us your cringe-worthy moment!

Enough is Enough

Ugh, seriously! One of these days I'm going to wake up and have everything in order and not feel like I'm living in a hotel. It seems that each week, more and more days are starting to feel like they belong to me. Last week I actually had two days in a row that felt like they fell into the realm of "normal". I have noticed that when I cook a meal, it feels foreign to me. When I go grocery shopping, it's like a new experience. These things tell me I've been out of touch with life for too long. It was actually kind of fun the other day to plan a menu, go shopping and then fix dinner from the ingredients I had. What a novel idea.

Don't get me wrong, I'm enjoying PTA. It's actually a slow down from parade. The many women who have volunteered to help out this year are doing a great job and I'm so grateful that I haven't had to do everything myself.

My husband and I joke that I'm on my one year countdown. Once parade was over on the 19 of July the clock started ticking, once July 18, 2009 is over- I'm taking a vacation. It will be finished.

Through all this I have learned one thing- I'm enough.

I have finally released myself from that feeling of needing to prove my worth to others. I know I can do it. I know I am strong (if not a little crazy) and I know that being a mom is more worthwhile than any other job or hobby in the universe. I'm grateful for this lesson and more than a little concerned that I had to drag my family on my journey of self discovery. I can only hope that the person I have become, and will continue to develop, will be the best person for my family. That through all our involvement my children will look back and say that their mom taught them that anyone can do hard things.